Your OCD questions answered!

Your questions answered! :-)

2010-01-05T08:40:00.001-08:00

Q.) Son, age 14, diagnosed with OCD since age 7. Has been under control until he hit puberty.

A.) At this young age, I would definitely see a counselor and schedule a doctors appointment to make sure that everything is fine. I would tell you to not let him do rituals and to not enable him to do rituals.

Q.) constant checking of marks on road, paths, walls etc. checking taps checking/worrying about cancer

A.) if you check something, say outloud that you've checked it and don't do it again for at least a half an hour, then resist for an hour and increase the time slowly.

Q.) I have ocd over blood diseases and std\\\'s. I feel like I can catch it from everything or anything. I worry over it all day everyday. email address

A.) There are some things that we cannot definitively control. You have done more than most people have to prevent these things. Sometimes you just have to let go and let God. If you don't give up control, your need for control will control you. If you let go of control and trust God, you will be free.

Q.) I am concerned about ocd and problems in my relationship. I seem to destroy every raltionship I am in because of jealousy, fear of being hurt etc. I also have ocd issues with everyday life, order, cleaning etc, but they do not cause me as much heartache email address

A.) When you are in a relationship, first be in one with someone that you trust. Don't do stalking behavior and don't go through his/her pockets and things looking for numbers. Just trust them knowing that the truth will come out. Do you really want to be with someone you have to keep tabs on? So if you don't display this behavior to yourself, your brain won't be thinking about it as intently and you can spend your time thinking about other things, such as your passion, which could be anything, helping children, swimming, skiiing, whatever! :-)

Q.) Dear Derek, very glad i have found this site!! I am 28 years old now and feel i should have got rid of thei problem earlier, as i have had from when i was young, but this is my problem in short, well hope its short enough!! I constantly regret almost everything i say cause i see the string of many outcomes of what is say, I end up try to reverse what i say, or say something to the person so that this string of unwanted outcomes do not come true!! but when i reverse it again i try to reverse it back! and sometimes keep doing this!I paranoid about the changes that might come out of what i say, that what I say will affect what they say to others and the outcomes of this, that they may affect me in a negative way!! I like to control everything. I can\\\'t tell anyone these negative thoughts because I would feel silly or embarrassed, selfish if i did! The thoughts always persist and reacurr again and again in my mind!! I always seek reassurance from others about what i\\\'ve said but i know if i told them all my thoughts that it would drive them mad!! its like i can\\\'t reassure myself for some reason!!This is very time consuming, and stressful as i spend days contemplating things and often end up staying in the house, cancelling any social things that i have, and find it hard to relax with my family, they don\\\'t know what is wrong with me. When one problem leaves another quickly arrives so i feel that i have not started living yet, when any issues are raised surrounding what i am thinking about come up , i link them to it, i get angry or feel threatened, fearful and even start throwing things around. also i\\\'m scared to give out too much of my contact information and if i do i regret it for ages!! for many reasons i am scared the person i give contact information might know a person i don\\\'t want to be in contact with!! I am scared that any member of my family/friends could bump into or work someone that i don\\\'t like or that has been mean to me in the past, and that they may acutally like them, and that i have to see them again!! that will really hurt!! I am indecisive about everything in my life also, ( as little aseven for example choosing a pasword or username),if i do make a decision, this is on nearly everything, i always think the opposite decision would have been better!! and spend ages asking i myself why i chose this decision, and what it would have like otherwise, for many reasons i am scared the person i give contact information I can never get rid of anything i own cause i think at sometime i will need it, I am also possesive over my valuables, even if i have five hats won\\\'t let sister wear one cause am scared she will lose it or ruin it!! If i lose something i have to turn my whole room upside down as i think it really important to me!! I don\\\'t like change cause i always think i might prefer it how it was before. I can often come across controlling to my family, i would hate my mum and dad to move house, but i also would hate them not moving house because of me, and then i think oh maybe i would like them to move. i don\\\'t like them talking about this I am only happy to out the house or join my family if i am in the perfect mindset, which very rarelly occurs. My family think i am self absorbed and think i want to have this problem, but i really really want to get rid of it as it is causing me a lot of distress, and it really is there i have always been like this since i was young cause i have never fully enjoyed anything i have done!! i find it hard to even go into detail with my problems with you casue they seem so small and unreasonable but for some reason i can\\\'t tell myself that and i wish i could!!! I very much see this as an obessive problem as the thoughts will always linger in my head, and i obsess over them all day!! i will probably feel after i send this that i have not even included enough in this email for you to deal with, but i reckon i have bored you already!! i always see other people as a lot more carefree and i just wish one day i could be like them. The reason i want help is not only be less stressed but also so i can give more to my family and so as i take a bigger part in this world. I would very much appreciate help!! thanks. email -

A.) The biggest problem here is your attempt to control everything in your life. You're going to control yourself into a tiny box at this rate. But...You don't have too! :-) You can let go of control and learn to trust that God made the universe and that He controls everything and everything happens for a reason. Spend more time thinking about what you want in your life instead of what you don't want.

Q.) I get thoughts that something is not ok with myyy face not cosmetically but in symmetry

A.) Abraham Lincoln had a disease that made his face contorted, that is why he had the thick beard, to hide it. If not, it would have been completely noticeable. If other people arn't telling you that your face not even then your face is even. Be happy, you've got an even face! :-) I know that you may think, "ya, but..." forget that. Wait till a doctor tells you it's not even before you come to any conclusions.

Q.) I suffer from mental rituals. Rituals that are based on axiety situations in the past, for example 2½ years ago. I can\\\\\\\'t forget these situations where I had magical OCD-thoughts - thoughts where I had the feeling that I could make somebody say something wrong, an error, typically on the telly. However, I know that I don\\\\\\\'t have telepathic abilities :-), so I start obsessing about what was said during the anxiety situation. I start asking myself questions like \\\\\\\"Why did he/she say what he/she did say?\\\\\\\"; \\\\\\\"Why did he/she not say that\\\\\\\" etc - and I find it odd. I start wondering about things that can be answered by the general answer: people make mistakes. \\\\\\\"errare humanum est\\\\\\\". Sometimes the answer can be easy, but I can\\\\\\\'t get it out of my head: The OCD tells me to think about this \\\\\\\"odd experience\\\\\\\" in the past over and over again. I never find the \\\\\\\"solution\\\\\\\", the answer of the questions or find peace in my mind. It\\\\\\\'s very hard for me to say: I don\\\\\\\'t care about what happened or what did not happen during my axiety experience in the past. The unsolved questions often causes swallow problems, so that I can\\\\\\\'t enjoy eating and drinking. In this way I punish myself. I hope you can follow my story. Thank you for this forum.

A.) OCD is a problem that is created and manufactured in your head so you cannot solve it. You cannot because your brain will always add to it and make it more difficult like a game with harder and harder levels. The answer to the OCD problem is to not try to figure it out, but to instead learn how to think about productive things like what your passion is and what you are going to eat for dinner and how you are going to make the world a better place.

Q.) im a muslim and i get thoughts like for example if i do a particular act i will not remain a muslim , for example silly things like if i drive i will no longer be a muslim, although i know these are silly thoughts but iam not able to control it i really get disturbed by it and am really vwry worried plz help me my email:

A.) Being a muslim is a choice, it's not something that comes and goes. No matter wherever you go or what you do, you can always choose to be a muslim.

Q.) Hi, I think i suffer with Pure OCD but im finding it very hard to get a proper diagnosis.My main problems are getting stuck on bad thoughts for hours and sometimes i get a fear that im losing my mind and it brings on an anxiety attack.Very scary when it\\\'s bad.

A.) If you don't distract yourself from this thought pattern when it happens, it will just get worse. Do anything you can, put on a movie, call a friend, pet your dog/cat. You don't have to sit there and dwell on thoughts you don't like. We cannot control the thoughts that pop into our heads, but we can control what we focus on. :-)

Q.) hi... my ocd include performing rituals repeatedly fear of causing harm to others plz kindly give me suggestions to overcome it i wud be greatful to u my mail id is

A.) If you are worried that you going to harm someone, the chances that you would actually do it are slim to none. We all have thoughts that disturb us, it's just how we react to them that make the difference whether they bother us or not. Stop reacting out of fear, just because you think of something that does not mean that it's going to happen. Have you ever thought about sleeping with someone but never did it? Just because you had the thought, it does not mean that you would do it, thoughts and actions are completely seperate.

Q.) Hi, I have been told that I have several chemical imbalances, ocd adhd anxiety depression bipolar etc. I am sick of it. I\\\'m tired of the meds. I just don\\\'t believe God created me to suffer and have many chemical imbalances in my mind that he made. I take Vyvanse, celexa, klonopin. Not to mention all the other drugs they have tried me on and all the other meds I take for pain that is supposedly caused by fibromyalgia. Funny thing is I had not smoked in 8 years and after starting Vyvanse for adhd 1 year ago I have become a chain smoker and very impulsive, isn\\\'t that the opposite of what this med should do for you? I want to quit it all but I get this drive in me that won\\\'t leave me alone until I give in, I have also had other addiction problems in the past is this normal for ocd?

A.) Yes it is, I tried self medicating myself, it's only when I got off the drugs that I could actually beat it. Drugs just drug you up and mask the problem, it's still there. We really don't have a miracle cure yet, you actually still have to "work through" your habits of OCD. People absolutely hate doing any kind of mental work and would rather be drugged up than put any effort in. You are one of the rare people that will actually become OCD free as long as you continue with perseverance and patience. I would talk to your doctor about reducing your medications and weaning you off one at a time while sumultaneously working on the mental side of things with someone.

Q.) My name is. I live in Danmark and have Ocd- only Obessions since I was 30 years. Now I am 44- so many years. Because I \\\"only\\\" have Obessions - I doesent now how your program can work for me ( help me) ? What du you think? Please answer me? Thank you very much. I,m not soo good to english så please forgive me. email adress:

A.) My program has helped thousands of people all around the world to take back control of their own minds. Most people that buy my program never even get through the whole thing and never apply it. The few that actually do something with it and are patient and persistent succeed and they never again will have to suffer from OCD.

Q.) I am doing alot better, but I am often convinced that I am hitting cars, poles, mailboxes, etc. when driving. I also have to check locks 3x or I panic and I have to unplug appliances, etc. I have tried to quit smoking several times with little to no success. I am trying to determine if my OCD is making it more difficult to quit since I don\\\'t actually crave the nicotine but the action that goes with the smoking and I have an almost fear of quitting.

A.) Our brain fears change just because with the unknown comes potential danger and your brain is all about protecting you. Sometimes however, this response does not fit and can cause things like OCD behavior and habits. Each day you should do one thing that makes you scared such as checking the lock only once. Tell yourself that you won't check it for another ten minutes and let your body actually face the anxiety. Facing a fear is the only way to beat one. I was scared to go on an airplane until I actually went on one. No amount of talking or medication would help this, I actually had to face it by doing it.

Q.) i have a problem standing up for myself, i don\\\'t allow myself to feel the not so nice feeling such as anger and frustration and as a result people have stepped all over me i am afraid of my anger but am sick and tired of bottling up all the frustration, i need to be able to express myself freely, the fear paralyze me, i need help.

A.) My favorite quote from the movie vanilla sky says, "Every minute is a chance to turn it all around." Today, stand up for yourself, just today. Then tomorrow, if you dare, tell yourself the same phrase, "today, just today, stand up for myself."

Q.) A constant thought of dying, what will happen, when will it happen, knowing that everything i know will be gone, the unknown. Used to just be at night, now all through the day aswell, find it real hard to distract myself from the thoughts. BUt continuing to think about it makes me anxious, panicky, not sleeping, failing uni etc

A.) We cannot control when we die. We all will die. It's part of life. Don't spend the time you are alive worrying about the extremely short time it will take for you to actually die. Instead while you are alive, live! Write down some things that you've always wanted to do, then do them! :-)

Q.) I feel repulsed to touch anything that has come in contact with my grandfather(who died 9 yrs ago)after seeing him masturbate obsessively. This includes things that have toouched things that come from the house, and people who have touched something that touched something else etc!This is really not good for me as I cant even touch my mother or any things in her possesion, it makes me feel frozen and contaminated. Id be so grateful if you could give an opinion on this!Thanks

A.) Your mother bathes and cleans her clothes, anything that may have been on her is gone. You cannot know or prove whether something is or isn't on anything you touch, "what if you are worried about something on your mom and there was nothing the whole time?"

Question below!

2008-12-09T07:00:00.000-08:00

i like to walk to try and get rid of thoughts, can this really work if done regually also cycling, does that work? Does listening to music whilst walking or cycling make a difference?

Exercise is one of the most effective ways to have more energy and health. I think listening to music is great. Listen to whatever makes you feel good. Make sure that you can hear oncoming traffic!~

35 questions below which will be answered throughout this week!

2008-12-08T22:59:00.000-08:00

Q.)How do you have a productive life with OCD?

A.)By defeating it with mental tools.

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Q.)How do I stop Intrusive thoughts? Is it possible to NOT have them all together?

A.)Everyone has intrusive thoughts, people without OCD don't take them seriously to the point of anxiety.

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Q.)how to make the unwanted images stop
A.)Don't fight them, the thought you resist persists

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Q.)I have OCD and wash my hands all the time till my skin get harsh, then I hold or open doors with my little finger now does this develop to a problem of organising events, stressing and then screaming?

A.) OCD can penetrate everything we do. When we train our brains to use rituals to deal with situations, we start to rely on them to relieve anxiety instead of simply accepting that we cannot control the world around us.

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Q.)does this OCD behavior of washing hands and holding doors with the little fingers develop to and affect organisational behavior (stressing in planning events and organising work)?

A.)Yes. See how long you can go without doing this ritual and this will help you to get used to the anxiety.

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Q.)I get afraid that I won\\\'t be able to forget something. My brain just repeats what I want to forget over and over. Can you explain why please?

A.)When we fight a thought, we are focusing on it. You need to distract your mind. An idle mind is OCD's playground.

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Q.)My boyfriend is OCD and refuses to go to therapy he is convinced they will put him on meds and he says he will not do it again. He is convinced that he will fix it himself. I feel he is ruining our relationship with all of his expectations, and the rules he wants me to follow. He says that I don’t care about his sanity, but he fails to see that for seven years I have done my best to follow the “program”. I am always given hypothetical examples from him, “If I was diabetic you wouldn’t give me candy. Please just do what I asked you to do.” I have stayed with him because I love him but I am coming to the end of my rope. He tells me that it is me, that I am to lacks, oblivious, I don’t think clearly, because I don’t think like him I am wrong. How can I help him so that we can fix our relationship?

A.)You've got to put your foot down and tell him that you love him but that you're not going to help him do rituals anymore and that you're not going to do rituals anymore. Tell him that you'll talk to him about it and be there emotionally, but that it's getting to the point where you may have to leave him if he's not willing to work with you. He has to care about your happiness too.

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Q.)why i feel almost everyone out there is trying to harm me in anyway like doing bad wishes for me/by casting spell/blak magick etc. especialy if some one is starring at me or touching me somewhere what should i do plz tell me how to handle this thing

A.)You need to give these people the benefit of the doubt. What if they are not doing black magic? Is it cool to think that they are? That's not fair to them.

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Q.)I am suffering from Religious OCD. How to overcome it ?

A.)Know that even if we have bad thoughts all day, God still loves us and still died for us. When you refuse to do the ritual, ask God for strength and give it your all and He will deliver in His time. Ask him what He wants you to learn out of this. I learned tons!

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Q.)I beileve some parts of Ocd I may have but Im trying to figure out if there is somehtings else going on. the ocd or whatever it is triggers bad when someone mentions soemthing verbally that I dont want to hear or when seeing somehting that reminds me of a bad memory that I need to get out of my head. its a battle between good vs evil I want the good and to get out the bad i have some rituals or I just get nervous. its a feeling like getting your hand dirty but instead its getting my thoughts dirty...not in a bad way just like I cant figure out why. whats goig on

A.)You need to use a technique called diversion, where when you have an OCD thought, you need to think about something that is complicated, like doing math problems in yoru head or trying to think of a way to make a lot of money. This is just one of many tools, but in your case I think it's the best answer. Also, don't fight the thought, just let it happen as you think about other things.

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Q.)i can\\\\\\\'t get normal things done because of obsessive behaviors;cleaning, searching a subject (relevent or irrelevent). how can this stop?

A.) You need to say to yourself, "STOP!" "I don't care what happens, I need to focus on the things I need to do and not waste my time with this!" "I choose to control my thoughts and not the other way around!"

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Q.)What if I don\\\'t have OCD and I am wasting the doctor\\\'s time?

A.)The doctor will tell you whether you have OCD or not.

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Q.)Why is it that most if not all Doctors believe OCD is a chemical embalance in the brain. This could not be further from the truth. Ocd causes the embalance not the other way round, and OCD is a natural consequence of general anxiety which causes the brain to repeat tasks that it is unsure have already been performed. Ocd GAD PTSD Etc are all caused by the one thing. A heightened CNS like a switch that has been turned up and wont come down. Emotional releasing by continual acceptance of this condition with eventually dissolve it. I treat people everday and without exception they all respond. A total cure is a reality not just a controlling of the condition but a total cure.

A.) Interesting comment!

Q.)My son feels the need to pray after each \\\\\\\"bad word \\\\\\\" that enters his thoughts uncontrollably in order to ask God\\\\\\\'s forgiveness. I feel this ony adds to the repetition and ritual ,so I told him that God understands that he isn\\\\\\\'t doing it on purpose and that he doesn\\\\\\\'t need to feel guilty or pray every time it happens. Is this a good idea?

A.) You are doing the right thing! Keep it up! My sister did this with her son and it has worked.

Q.)What is the real cause of OCD? What is really happening/malfunctioning, and how do you overcome or correct what is wrong in the brain?

A.) It's just a coping mechanism and an attempt to control things. Tell yourself, "I don't care, I'll let go and let God!" Let God control the world around you, you can't even if you wanted to anyway!

Q.)fear of being gay

A.) You worded this perfectly, it's just a fear, fear doesn't exist, you can't touch it, smell it, hear it, look at it, etc.

Q.)what made you realize that your ocd was officially out of your life and you felt \\\"normal\\\" again??

A.) When I could quickly dispell any OCD thought without feeling the need to do a ritual. Over time you get less and less OCD thoughts so you have to use your tools less and less.

Q.)I find it impossible to let go of my worries. I realise that until I resist my obsessions they will never go away but my obsessions can last days not hours and I am too frightened to resist them

A.) Don't look at them as having to stop them for good. Set small goals for yourself of resisting your rituals. Say, "I'm going to go ten seconds without performing this ritual!" Then keep gradually increasing your goal. The more you do this, the better you will be.

Q.)Is OCD treatable with out Medicines?

A.) yes!

Q.)how do i know if im lying to myself to make things... alright? im sure this has been asked many times :)

A.) lying to yourself is a good thing! Especially to dispell thoughts that are lying to you telling you have to worry when you don't really have to.

Q.)Will I ever be able to get rid of this disorder? Will I ever be normal?

A.) yes, you just need to do the work it takes, which is described in many of the other questions asked on this blog!

Q.)Why do I feel that something bad is going to happen or someone is going to think something bad of me if I don\\\'t do one of my rituals?

A.) It's just a fear, in order to get rid of this, tell yourself that you don't care and then do what you told yourself.

Q.)What can I do about panic attacks combined with my OCD?

A.) panic attacks drive your OCD. you need to face your anxiety by refusing to do a ritual as long as you can, expose yourself to something enough and your fear of it will go down, it's inevitable.

Q.)does OCD impair memory, it feels like im thinking in my head so much that i am oblivious to the world around me.

A.) yes, if you keep worrying about something, your mind will be thinking about that then what you are supposed to be focusing on.

Q.)My OCD has gotten worse since my separation with my husband of 10 years. Is stress normal for enhacing OCD?

A.) yes, it drives OCD. whatever you did when you were with your husband in your mind, you can do the same thing, you may be way better off now and are free and find the joy in your situation!

Q.)How likely is it that I will \\\"pass on\\\" my OCD to my children?

A.)Get rid of your OCD so that they don't see you doing rituals, children do what we do more than what we say.

Q.)why did i start becoming ocd to where i went on ssi and ss because i didn\\\'t work at one place before going to a new place right at age 18 and the events from my life at the time ,those events are when i started acting the way i act?thanks

A.) OCD is caused by anxiety, a change that is perceived as major in our lives causes higher stress levels.

Q.)Are there any natural foods that have been proven to decrease obsessions and compulsions?

A.) Make sure that you get your daily dose of vitamins and enough rest. If your brain cells can function at their best, you're battle against OCD will be much easier!

Q.)How best to deal with the pent-up frustration and anger from doing rituals for many years before seeking treatment?

A.) Let out your frustrations in healthy ways, like exercise! meditation and art, etc!

Q.)Are there any things i can do each day to get rid of my OCD

A.) See how long you can go without doing your ritual, beat your goal each day!

Q.)Is it actually possible to get over OCD or can it just be kept manageable?

A.) yes, and yes, it's your choice, depending on what you will allow yourself to believe.

Q.)How can I get rid of OCD

A.) see other posts below and above!

Q.)how to stop it?

A.) Say "STOP!" to the chatterbox in your head. Tell it what to do, not the other way around.

Q.)Is OCD an opposition/rejection of God in an attempt to control our outcomes favorably? Can OCD be cured by complete faith in one\\\'s higher power or atleast, the rejection that evil/outside forces have power over our freedom? It seems to have a connection to spirituality/faith and fear/control.

A.) OCD can be cured with faith in God regardless of what anyone else tells you. If they don't choose to believe, that's their loss.

Q.)pulling out my eyebrows

A.) Write down the pros and cons of doing this.

Q.) Why am I afraid of commitment?

2008-12-08T05:31:00.000-08:00

A.) With some people, anything that seems final brings about fear in someone with OCD. It's the loss of control or perceived loss of control that brings about the fear. Let go of control and you'll drop the fear that's attached to it.

Question below!

2008-12-02T14:42:00.000-08:00

Q.) My 15 year old daughter is suffering from what I believe is OCD. What is the best way to get her to agree to seek help for this, and get her willing to read more on this, so we can put an end to all her rituals that seem to be distracting her from having fun and enjoying her life. Sincerely Helene & Jim Famularo

A.) The best way for someone to be motivated enough is for them to feel that there is more pain in having OCD than facing it. She probably deals with it by avoiding facing it. The post under this one will explain more on what she can do.

Question below!

2008-12-02T14:35:00.000-08:00

I am the mother of a 19 year old dealing with OCD and and eating disorder. Your questions and statements are kone\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s we would find most valuable answered. How to figure out what triggered your OCD in the 1st place. This seems like it would be valuable in knowing yourself so you can work on making chnages for REAL CURE. We\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'d love to have you help us with this. Thank You Rhe difference between what most people think OCD to be and what it really is. My son has been prescribed PRozac for OCD and an Eating Disorder. He is a very gifted cross country runner. While taking this prozac his competetive spirit was gone. When he quit taking it he started achieving ingredible times again. He said he could tell the difference. He said he felt more like himself after he went off it. We know it takes work but there is no one where we live that even wants to do the work with someone willing and wanting it. All they want to do is give out medication. I saw a show on MTV a few years ago where a Phsychiatrist worked with 2 different patients for 15 days with exposure therapy and had incredible lasting results for these young people. We are interested in finding out answers to your topics.

A.) Your OCD originates in fear. Honestly, you don't need to know how it all started to cure it. You can turn on and off a light switch without knowing a thing about electricity or switches. Sometimes people even bump into a switch and the light will turn on and they won't make the connection. The point is that these things can help you turn the switch off.

Your son can do something very simple. When he has a compulsion to do a ritual, he can ask himself, what am I afraid will happen if I don't do this ritual? That is the root fear driving that ritual. Then he knows what fear to face. He can do face this fear by seeing how long he can go without performing the ritual and learn to let the feelings of anxiety wash over him so he can get used to them. Then after awhile he won't be scared of the anxiety feelings, and if he loses the fear of the anxiety, the OCD will not be able to exist and will melt away.

Question below!

2008-12-02T14:29:00.000-08:00

Q.) is flooding an effective treatment of OCD as opposed to graded exposure? (my type of OCD is obsessions with lists/memorising stuff)

A.) I would memorize some scriptures about fear. Memorize Phil 4:8 definitely.
When you feel like you are obsessing, quote this scripture to yourself, then think about the things that you love. Make a happy place for you to go in your mind like a mini vacation, then go there, like day dreaming. After a while, just like with most tactics, just thinking about the tactic will take away the OCD, then a while after that, your OCD thoughts will decline until you get to the point that you're like, wow, I just had an OCD thought and it's simple to dismiss them at this point.

Question below!

2008-12-02T14:25:00.000-08:00

Q.) I\\\\\\\'m not sure if this is an OCD but I keep getting an all consuming panic that there is no meaning to life and no life hereafter and can\\\\\\\'t think of anything else and get really depressed. Is there a way I can stop this thinking, it\\\\\\\'s horrible!

A.) Dont' fight these thoughts, just let them occur. Write down everything on a piece of paper that makes you feel warm and fuzzy. Here is an example that I've done for myself, I like escalades, fur coats for men, nice jewelry, being warm in the winter time, chilling with the ladies and friends, singing, listening to a good sermon, watching my favorite movies, cotton candy. There doesn't need to be any order to the list and honestly, by just doing this example list for you, I forgot the question you asked me because of how these things make me feel happy ;p

Question below!

2008-12-02T14:22:00.000-08:00

Q.) My quesion is do you offer any help with breathing obsessions such as manually breathing for yourself unless you are asleep or really busy.

A.) Yes, I used to suffer from this for a short period. I would go to the hospital and tell the doctor that I felt like I was hyperventilating. This could have been the case I was told. I was told to breathe in for six seconds and out for three. I've also seen different second increments. These are just to calm you down. I found that they didn't work to well for me. Instead, what did the trick was to distract myself from my breathing altogether and my body would just take over. Every time I thought about it again, it would come back, but then I would distract myself again. It gets easier with practice. Try movies and chess, math, books, etc. See what works best for you.

Q.) what is Ocd

2008-12-02T14:20:00.000-08:00

A.) It is obsessive compulsive disorder. It really is a side effect of anxiety. It's how people sometimes deal with the anxiety they feel as a coping mechanism.

Q.) HOW TO STOP ONESELF DOING THE ROUTINES

2008-12-02T14:17:00.000-08:00

A.) Actually it's funny the wording you used because that's the answer for this tactic. Say "STOP!" to yourself and tell yourself what ritual you are doing and why you are doing it. When you express it and get it out of your head, it will help to show your brain that it is truly ridiculous. Some people have actually found that this one tactic alone destroyed one of their OCD's.

Q.) could not see a coins printed numbers

2008-12-02T14:13:00.000-08:00

A.) Sometimes we have fears of thoughts we have as if there is something wrong with us. We get this gut feeling that's sickening and makes us feel like something is wrong. This is an overreaction to what we are experiencing. We are interpreting what we are seeing or thinking we are seeing as something that should be feared. The Bible says, "fear not." God does not want us to live in fear, but in hope. The next time that you get anxiety because of thoughts like this, tell yourself that this is OCD and anxiety and that you will not be afraid for God is with you. Also, if you find that you can't see print well, it may just be that you need glasses ;p

Question below!

2008-12-02T14:09:00.000-08:00

Q.) I\\\\\\\'m Romanian, I come from an orthodox family. Is it possible to cure of OCD and keep my faith? Why do I feel that I don\\\\\\\'t know what my faith is anymore? Trying to prove myself that tere is no devil that could posess me, I kind of ruined my belives about God, Jesus, etc... I feel very guilty.

A.) God will forgive you if you just ask Him to. He wants to forgive you, He died on the cross just to save you so you know He's serious. Curing OCD actually will strengthen your faith. I try to make it very clear that without God, I would not have cured my OCD. At the same time, without massive action and a burning desire to get rid of OCD, no amount of faith in God would have helped me. Jesus said that faith is dead without works. I find that my program works whether you are a Christian or not. I also find that it's easier if you are a Christian. Science has proven that faith in God actually helps recovery.

Q.) How do you treat breathing obsessions ocd

2008-12-02T14:05:00.000-08:00

A.) This is a very good question. I used to have this problem for a short time. You may find that breathing exercises may not feel helpful. At the same time, it's comforting to know that there is a breathing pattern that can help, especially when a doctor tells you about it. I have heard many, I would say breathe however is comfortable for you. The real answer is to not think about your breathing because when you are not controlling your breathing, your body breathes the way it's supposed to naturally! So focus on distraction tactics here. One thing you can do right now is to do something that entertains you or makes you think, like chess, math, thought evoking movies, books. Experiment and find which one works best for you.

Q.) How do I get rid of it!

2008-12-02T14:03:00.000-08:00

A.) You must replace it with other more productive thoughts. You can make this much easier by choosing a passion to pursue. Something that you can get excited about and something that will bring happiness into your life. Do what God has made you to do and you will be happy.

Q.) the cure

2008-12-02T11:58:00.000-08:00

A.) The cure to OCD is to face the fears that drive the anxiety one by one systematically eliminating them. Take it in bite sized chunks. Most people look at their OCD as this huge mountain to overcome, look at it as a stair case where you climb one tiny step at a time.

Question below!

2008-12-01T04:57:00.001-08:00

Q.) Why cant I shift these horrible thoughts, and more to the point, why the heck do I have them in the first place.

A.) You have them as a coping mechanism. It's your brain's way of dealing with anxiety. OCD is a sign of anxiety. Don't worry about shifting the thoughts or even doing anything to them. Simply let them stay and linger as long as they want. And at the same time, focus on whatever thoughts make you happy. Your brain wants what you deprive of it, if you try to take away OCD thoughts, it will defy you and have them anyway. But if you let the brain have the thought, while you focus on other more important things that are worth your time, the brain will get bored like a child because it can't get your full attention.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Question below!

2008-12-01T04:54:00.001-08:00

Q.) if you have thoughts about satan, can you be posessed, or is it just ocd?

A.) People that are possessed don't always know they are possessed. I would bet the farm that it's more likely to be OCD. If you feel like you have to do rituals in order to fight these satanic thoughts, then it's definitely OCD.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Question below!

2008-12-01T04:52:00.000-08:00

Q.) How can I locate the subjacent fear that causes obsessive thoughts?

A.) When you go to perform a ritual, don't do it, and whatever fear comes to mind, is the driving fear.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Question below!

2008-12-01T04:32:00.000-08:00

Q.) What is the best way to get a person to realize and accept that they may have OCD

A.) Ask them if they feel something bad is going to happen if they don't perform the ritual that you know they are performing. If they say no, challenge them not to do the ritual and if they have to do it, tell them they have OCD. Then tell them that millions of Americans have OCD and that there is a cure and that we'll work with discreetly to get rid of it.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Question below!

2008-11-30T13:22:00.000-08:00

Q.) How do i make the thoughts stop? The intrusive, obsessive, anxiety causing scary thoughts hoe do i make them stop

A.) You don't try. The harder you try to push a thought out of your head, the stronger it will be there. Your brain works on habits. You have a habit of thinking this way and it's easier for the brain to take this pathway because it is the one that is chosen all the time. Just like a path through the woods, if you don't travel down it for a while, it gets all weeded up and harder to go down. Well the same thing with OCD thoughts. This path is wide and open because it is travelled a lot. Choose the road less travelled. The road that is the non-OCD choice. Sure it will be harder at first, but eventually the OCD path will be filled with roots and thickets and harder to travel down and the non-OCD path will be nice and wide and easy to travel down.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Q.) I just wanna know if it will ever go away??

2008-11-30T13:14:00.000-08:00

A.) It will if you believe it will. You must be patient and have the courage to do the legwork that is required. Now I'm not going to lie to you and say it's easy, but I'd be lying if I said that it was too hard either. It's not as bad as you think. Yes, it will go away, and with the skills you can learn in these posts for free, it is virtually impossible to have OCD.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Q.) how to overcome ocd

2008-11-30T13:11:00.000-08:00

A.) Realize that it's possible to get rid of it in the first place. A lot of people still think it's only something that you can cope with. I went to the bookstore today and the guy said that they only had books on how to deal with it because it's impossible to cure it. I had to set him straight and let him know the real deal, that I had it and now it is gone! One of the major things you can do right now it to put a smile on your face and say to yourself, " I am finally going to beat this thing!"

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Question below!

2008-11-29T09:38:00.000-08:00

Q.) I have continuous thoughts of the what if\\\'s, such as what if this happens are what if I do something bizzare. i know all these thoughts are just to scare myself but i have been dealing with this for 12, years how do I solve this problem?

A.) Oh, this is an easy one and very fun too! Next time you get the "what if's" simply switch em a bit, such as, "what if I die?" instead say, "What if I don't die?"

What if she rejects me? instead, "what if she doesn't reject me?"

What if I contaminate her? "What if I don't contaminate her?"

Try it, it flips your mind and it's fun.

Yours for mental freedom,

Derek

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Questin below!

2008-11-29T09:37:00.001-08:00

Q.) what diet I can have to eliminate symptoms?

A.) Organic, period.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Q.) Will I ever really be free of it?

2008-11-29T09:33:00.000-08:00

A.) If you believe you can be and you learn the things that you need in order to achieve your goal, then it's impossible for you not to become OCD free.

Get rid of your OCD now!<------------

Question below!

2008-11-29T09:30:00.000-08:00

Q.) What is the easiest way to rid yourself of the doubt that\\\'s caused by ocd?

A.) Tell it to shut up and to get out of your office! Or be like Donald trump and say, "You're fired!" I am so not even kidding either, you gotta take charge. You are not the victim of here of anything accept yourself. Stop beating yourself up and take charge and say, I will decide what I think about, I will not let my thoughts dictate a thought pattern, I will instead, choose the thought pattern that will make me feel more happy and fullfilled in life, period!

Question below!

2008-11-29T09:25:00.000-08:00

Q.) I have taken zoloft for 6 months and was doing really well the last three. I have been drinking a little more alcohol in the last week and have noticed my symptoms return. Will it take a while before the meds start working agai. I have also joined a gym program two days ago

A.) yes, alchohol is a no no when trying to become OCD free. So ix nay on the alcohol ay. ok? I know from experience, that's not a train you wanna ride, trust me, it does not end well! Yes, stay on your prescribed meds and don't get off them until doc says it's ok. It's great you are working out, work out whenever you feel like drinking, even if the gym is closed, go running. Get a buddy to go with you if you want even thought this is not necessary. If you feel like you are going to be to weak and you will give into drinking, have someone to call who will talk you out of it, seriously, You gotta take control and you can do it if you follow this carefully. In life we only get so many chances, this may be your last one man, so don't blow it! I got your back, and you can e-mail me anytime 24/7!

Question below!

2008-11-29T09:22:00.000-08:00

Q.) My OCD issue is with non stop thoughts. How do get rid of them?

A.) Let them happen, you won't be able to ignore them, just like you won't be able to ignore an elephant in the room, but you can still do other things knowing that the elephant is still there. Ok, enough stories, Don't fight the thoughts, if you resist, they persist. Instead, say, fine, but, I'm going to also think about, whatever it is you want to think about. Think about this, what is it that you would rather think about. Then next time you have these thoughts, think about the thing that you have prepared to think about.

Question below!

2008-11-29T09:18:00.000-08:00

Q.) What makes it so impossible to ever feel peace again on something once ocd has targeted that thing. ie: I used to have a very strong faith but after many intrusive upsetting thoughts I feel like I can\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'t escape their shadow and constantly feel like something is wrong. Will I ever feel peace again?

A.) When Jesus was fasting for forty days and nights, the devil went up to Him and tempted Him time and time again. Jesus stood his ground until the devil went away. You must do the same thing. Jesus has shown us that it can be done, not by telling us, but also by doing it Himself. I am not Jesus, but I have been in your position and have withstood the thoughts by letting them exist but focusing on that which I love and since it's my mind, I felt like I should be able to think about that which I want to think about, don't you agree? If you do, be firm with yourself and decide to think about what you want to think about. Be the leader of your thoughts, not the follower. No one is going to come along and annoint you the leader of your thoughts, you just have to take that position and it's just as easy as deciding that that is what you are going to do!

Question below!

2008-11-29T09:14:00.000-08:00

Q.) hey derek, it\\\'s moy , ammmmmmm i feeling kinda shameful to share this part but today i was trying to dust off dusts or whatever dirty thing i saw as if it creeping in a little button on the couch, i kept on pushing my little fingers in the button trying to remove whatever went in and everytime i do it i kept on thinking it\\\'s still there because i feel something grainy or hard in it, so i kept on doing that not knowing my skin was rubbing against the couch and i started to bleed. even though i felt it was hurt i still wanted to do it again because all i want is it to be clean, derek, i hurt my hands and i sad about it.....i feel like i abuse muh self..... the way i think. i couldn\\\'t touch muh hands too much under water because of my skin peeled and burst and blood bled.....in my fingers........ 3 of my fingers...... that happened to me one time before i met u online when i was trying to dig up something that was sticking on the door of my bedroom........i end up rubbing the palm of my hands against the wooden door and even though it hurts i still continue ignoring the pain because i was trying to get rid of whatever it was sticking at the the door,,,,,,,anyway, i too shame to say this but ah saying it anyhow because i need your help, and i have been improving with the glasses u told me about, it was hard in the beginning with all the anxiety that i felt like drinking lots of water and eat just to get rid of the negative thoughts then again i conscious of my weight i then exercise sigh!!!!!!!! and the washing of my hands i improved on that a lot thank u so much derek........i just ever wonder derek. is GOD angry with in what i going through or is HE ignoring me..because i go through this ocd crap i hate ocd ,, i wish i never went throught this.....i wish it wasn\\\'t me because all my friends in church not going through this..... i can still go out and still have fun but objects does bother me geeeeeeeeeeeeeeese .... u know derek, i know my calling in life was to be a worship leader,,,,,,,,,i love to worship and dance but this thing i\\\'m going through i don\\\'t knnow how i\\\'m going to reaaach where GOD wants me to be.. and to do..........it\\\'s so much i going through.........i knoow GOD WORKING OUT THINGS IN MY LIFE BUT THIS OCD THING I FIND GOD NOT TAKING ME ON OR NOT ANSWERING MY PRAYER WELL AH SHOULDN\\\'T ANSWER THAT......... I MEAN I DIDN\\\'T KNOW I COULDA MEET U TO HELP ME.......... FOR SOMEONE LIKE U TO GO THROUGH THIS AND NOW U ARE FREE FROM OCD.......I GLAD U DID...........I HOPE U PRAY I DO TOO AND I HOPE U BELIEVE I CAN,,,,,I CRY A LOT BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH I LOVE WORSHIP AND WANTS TO REAACH TO THAT PLACE WHERE GOD WANTS ME TO BE , I THINK ABOUT THIS OCD THING THAT U KNOW THE ( IF) MONSTER WORD U SAID TO ME BEFORE I SHOULD STOP.......WHAT IF THIS OCD THING ONLY COMES BACK FROM TIME TO TIME........I \\\'M SCARED OF THIS IN MY LIFE.......DO I NEED DRUGS OR MEDICATIONS OR TABLETS.....BECAUSE I DON\\\'T WANT AND REFUSE TO TAKE TABLETS OR ANY KIND OF MEDICATIONS IN MY BODY BECAUSE OF THE CHEMICALS GOING IN MY BLOOD , ANYWAY, ENT I DONT NEED MEDICATIONS OR IS IT JUST I NEED TO RENEW MY THOUGHTS, DEREK. I WASN\\\'T LIKE THIS BEFORE . I NEVER USED TO DO THESE THINGS I WAS THIS CAREFREE PERSON MEANING I DIDN\\\'T CARE ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD I WAS LIKE THAT BEFORE I GAVE MY LIFE TO CHRIST BUT NOW WHENI I GAVE MY LIFE TO CHRIST I STARTED TO FEEL THERE IS HOPE THAT THERE IS A GOD AND HIS NAME IS JESUS ,SON OF THE LIVING GOD, BUT THEN I WENT THROUGH SOMETHING THAT WAS SPRITUAL AND I GOT DEPRESSED AND I FELT THERE \\\'S NO HOPE AND I FELT LIKE GOD NOT TAKING ME ON AND GOD DON\\\'T CARE ABOUT ME ANYMORE AND THENI STARTED BLAMING OBJECTS AROUND ME........IT\\\'S NOT LIKE I HAVE PEOPLE TO BLAME BUT I STARTED TO MAKE A BIG DEAL ABOOOOUT EVERYTHING,, I STARTED TO BRUSH MUH TEETH LONG AND RINSING MY CUP LOOOOOOOOONG OVER AND OVER AND TELLING MYSELF THE CUP NOT CLEAN .AH SEEING ALL KIND OF THINGS ..........AND THEN IT GOES ON LIKE THAT ON WITH OTHER AREAS OF MY LIFE........... NOT REALISING I OPENED MY HEART TO PETTY UNNECESSARY THINGS AROUND ME, BUILDING MY OWN STRONGHOLDS AND ONE DAY I FOUND THAT IT WAS SO HARD TO COME OOUT............THEN I NEVER GIVE UP I DIDN\\\'T KNOW I CAN LOOK UP ON THE INTERNET FOR HELP.....I TRIED IT ONE DAY AND I JUST TYPE OUT HOW TO OVERCOME CLEANING OBSESSIONS. AND THEN U CAME UP............ I TYPE OUT SOMETHING BEFORE BUT ALL KIND OF CRAZY THINGS POP AND THAT WASNN\\\'T WAT I WAS SEEKING FOR AND THEN U CAME UP AND I TRIED U AND YES U ARE HELPING ME.....I TRYING MY BEST TO APPLY WHAT U TELLING ME AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS COME OUT OF THIS PIT I\\\'M IN.......... SOMETHING I DID FOR MYSELF.......YES DEREK...I REALISE I CREATE THIS STRONGHOLD I FELT I REGRET I DID BUT NOW.........TIME FOR ME TO COME OUT... PLEASE ANSWEER MOY. BYE DEREK......U HAVE A GREAT DAY........ I DID N\\\'T KNOW U\\\'RE A CHRISTIAN.......I MEAN U BELIEVE I N GOD TOO THAT\\\'S GREAT.........I GLAD U DID!!!!!!!!! LOVE U ALWAYS........FROM MOY WITH CHRIST\\\'S LOVE

A.) God loves you Moy, I would really consider seeing your doctor and asking them if Citalopram is right for you. This medication is for cases that are a little bit tougher to crack, and I think this in conjunction with my program would be a more well rounded approach in your particular case. Go see your doctor this week and see what he feels about Citalopram.

Question below!

2008-11-29T09:11:00.000-08:00

Q.) how can i stop doing things as a result of feeling guilty and instead think about what is best for myself

A.) Make sure to put a smile on your face first, then it will be easier to to put a smile on other's faces. It's contageous. If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours. When you smile it releases chemicals that will make you feel the way that you want to feel. The smile comes before the happiness!

Question below!

2008-11-29T08:27:00.000-08:00

Q.) how can i stop dling things because i feel guilty if i dont, whether please the other side or please whoever is receiving and instead look for my best?

A.) Sometime it's best to care but don't care too much. You seem like a very nice person who has a big heart, however, this heart is betraying you and causing you pain. What you need to do is just tone down how much you care just a few notches so that your love for what is good and right doesn't interfere with your happiness. You have heard of the comedian who is so worried about putting a smile on everyone elses face that he forgets to put a smile on his own face. Don't be that comedian.

Question below!

2008-11-29T08:21:00.001-08:00

Q.) whenever i see or listen something bad or horrible .......my mind start using those events/words/things to make abusing statements for me/my dear ones. ex: if i see knife it will say \\\"someone will kill u wid knife\\\" if i read just a bit about some dangrous disease it will say \\\"u will have the same\\\" hundreds of this kind of statement i face daily!! wat should i do second thing it made me a rule for me that i have to perform every action seeing something good/pleasent only and at the same it shows me the worst images so that i cant perform any action.......so in order to do that particular action i start thinking of good image then perform that action!!whetether i am going to wash my hand/putting a cup/wearing shirt etc. last time i have written my question in short.......your last reply 2 me gave me some confidence to write more!! thankx so much

A.) This is called the chatter box in your mind. It's the negative chatterbox which is that little voice inside that beats you up. Telling you that you can't do it, that you'll never make it, that you have to do rituals. When you hear this chatterbox, tell it to "shut up!" Be firm with it, DO NOT accept what it says because it's just a big meany! You are the new boss in town and what you want to go will, because it is YOUR mind. I believe in you!

Derek

Q.) How i do an appropiate exposure?

2008-11-27T19:38:00.000-08:00

A.) When you feel the need to do a ritual, just don't do it. Then see how long you can go without performing that ritual. If it gets too umbearable, do the ritual. Then try again and see how far you can set your record. You don't have to do everything cold turkery here. Just push yourself with goals.

Question below!

2008-11-27T14:12:00.000-08:00

Q.) What are the steps that I need to follow in order to get rid my OCD regardless of the efforts that I will have to provide?

A.) recognize when a thought is obsessive

isolate that thought

come up with a suitable replacement

when that thought comes up again, do the replacement

when the thought is bothersome, let it linger while doing the replacement

rinse, repeat

Q.) How to Stop obstrusive thoughts?

2008-11-27T12:38:00.000-08:00

A.) Don't fight the thoughts. Thoughts that we resist, persist. Instead let those thoughts stay there, just at the same time start to focus on the thoughts that you do want to be having, such as what you are going to make for dinner and or what things that you could be doing for fun and entertainment!

Q.) How can I stop obsessing over an argument and forgive someone.

2008-11-27T12:37:00.000-08:00

A.) Go up to that person, and say, I forgive you. It hasn't been easy for me, but if God can forgive me and all my flaws, I can forgive you!

Q.) can OCD be completely cured

2008-11-27T12:36:00.000-08:00

A.) Yes it can, although it takes time because there are stages. It may take a few days to get you to stop performing rituals, but it may take several months for you to be able to not have cravings. Just be willing to put the work that is required into it and I promise you, it will all be over before you know it and the happiness that follows is just such a blessing!

Question below!

2008-11-27T12:34:00.000-08:00

Q.) every action i do i must think or see good image / people only even every keystroke while typing this question!!!!! coz of this i work so slowly these days that is disgusting please help

A.) Think of each key stroke as one more ounce of medicine healing you from OCD. The faster you type each key, the faster you will get over OCD. Start getting your medicine right away!

Q.) What are medications in OCD..?

2008-11-27T12:32:00.000-08:00

A.) Some are Citalopram, Ativan, Xanax, Prozac, Lexapro, Clonazepam, etc. either used for sudden symptoms or long term affect, they are listed in no particular order and you must talk to your doctor to find out what's right for you.

Q.) will ocd guys cannot learn new things

2008-11-27T12:30:00.000-08:00

A.) People that have OCD, once they start to get over it, learn very strong techniques that will also help them in all other areas of their lives. So don't go believing that you won't be able to learn anything, learning ability is not in any way shape or form affected by OCD scientifically.

Q.) how can we cure ocd

2008-11-27T12:28:00.000-08:00

A.) We can cure it by simply stopping. However getting ourselves to stop is not the easiest thing on the planet! What I would suggest that you do right away is to find a passion, something that really puts you in a good mood when you are doing it and do that more often. Think about how you can make money do this activity and then implement it!

Question below!

2008-11-27T12:23:00.000-08:00

Q.) hey derek, it\\\'s moy , i have another one that i didn\\\'t mention before and i thought i can handle that one but it don\\\'t seems that i can. anyway, if u were a female and u have long black hair, and sometimes your hair fall on the bed . well what i trying to say derek is that most of the time i\\\'m consciously disturbed only thinking my hair fell gone inside my pillow case, i\\\'m not scared the hair will harm me but it does bother me having a hair inside the pillow case because i only thinking what if it is there forever and no one knows that it\\\'s there but me. i clean my bedsheets whenever i feel it needed to be washed but what\\\'s bothering me derek is that i want to know if i throw all my pillow cases and blankets and sheets in the washing machine , will the water flow through inside all the pillow cases so that it will drain out all the hair as it flows out. i do not know with 6 pillow cases four long ones and two short ones and a bed sheet and a blanket in the machine piled up together ,i dont know if the water will pass through the all the pillow cases and as it flows out it will carry all the hairs if it does have any , then i\\\'m asking does the water does go through the pillow cases in the washing machine, don\\\'t know if it does.......if it does flow through with 6 pillow cases can the water carry the hairs and all other dirty stuff inside as it flows out ...can it. i want to know the truth. i can\\\'t see i inside the washing machine because of soap, i ignorant about it........i have 6 pillows because i used to be scared before and i used it to surround me around the bed like a shield i used to be scared of demons coming to hold my feet all that but i got over it, i not scared of those coming near me because i have Jesus and his blood and his word , but i so accustomed having the pillows there now to think about removing them and having just two or one....ah wonder..... anyway, please help........the hair thing most disturbing me the most .......ok......bye bye derek from moy moy!!!!!!!!!!u have a great day and GOD BLESS U AND CONTINUE USING U MIGHTILY... LOVE U WITH CHRIST\\\'S LOVE..........BYEE..

A.) You are suffering from the "what if" monster. What if this, what if that and the answer to each what if is always more scary. Whenever you see yourself getting sucked into a what if party, stop it by saying, "what if" it doesn't matter if noone ever sees the hair again, "what if I forget it and don't care about it, "what if I stopped thinking about all this crap and just moved on with my life? What if I I stopped wasting my time with negative thoughts and started thinking about what I love and what I need to be as my responsibilities. You really got to get stern with yourself. You are the master, not OCD. Show it who's boss! I believe in you!

Question below!

2008-11-27T12:18:00.000-08:00

Q.) I want to change and do something for myself. I\\\'m always doing something for others but never for myself. My problem is what to do ... I need to find something that I\\\'m passionate about that can motivate me to make a change and take a step forward for me.

A.) For the next week, I want every answer from your mouth to others is a simple, "no." Sorry, I can't, I'm swampped." Something like this will suffice. Say no to every favor, every little thing.

Write a list of the things that make you the happiest. On that list, consider that money doesn't exist, what things would you start doing if all your bills were suddenly being taken care of by the government and you could do whatever you wanted. Whatever you write down, pick the one that you love the most and go to the bookstore and find the book that most excites you about that subject and devour that book. Do what it says and you will start a new, exciting life! Enjoy!

Question below!

2008-11-26T19:15:00.000-08:00

Q.) Basically my mind is stuck, like anyone with OCD. But I\\\'m not worrying about anything that can physically harm me. (germs, stove turned on..etc) I was in this class where we go once a week to an elementary to be a big buddy to some kid. There was no reason to dislike the kid I was a buddy to and I really don\\\'t dislike him. For some reason I just couldn\\\'t continue that class. I don\\\'t know why but it was always on my mind even though nothing happened. So I switched to another class where I would just kinda help with some mentally handicapped students at our high school. It was the only way I could get out of the one class and I was always good with mentally handicapped kids, so I thought I would be fine. (the same way I felt about elementary kids) More or less, the same thing happened. I got out of that class and was fine for about a week. (the same way I felt when switching out of the elementary one) But then I saw a picture of me and the elementary kid that was taken. Right away I had no problem with it, but then I obsessed about it and had to go out of my way to take it down. (someone else had it hanging up) I was fine again. But barely a day later I just kept thinking about the kid and worry that somehow him just knowing me and thinking about me will keep me from enjoying things. No reason at all. I don\\\'t feel guilty at all and I know there is no reason to think that somehow just knowing him will keep me from my normal life that I had. So the main thing I\\\'m worried about is that I\\\'m afraid I\\\'ll keep thinking about him just knowing me. But by worrying about thinking about it I think about it and there\\\'s nothing I can do about like dropping a class. Sometimes I\\\'ll reason to myself why this fear makes no since and I get momentary relief, but then it keeps coming back. Is this OCD even if there is not a ritual besides trying to reason to myself why my thoughts don\\\'t make since?

A.) This is the beginning of OCD, but you don't have to worry because I am going to show you how to break this cycle. The next time you have the thought of that kid or any kid, just pray for him or her/ Lord Jesus, please be with that student and may You bless them! In Your name, Amen! Then focus on what it is that you have to get done or that which you love. Of course the thought of the kid will be there and you have prayed for him/her and I'm telling you that's all you can do and is the best most moral thing that you can do and you've done it, so now it's ok to allow yourself to focus on other things. Now focus on what you love to think about and what you need to get done, whether it's work, school, family, etc. Let the annoying thought linger there and as you focus on the things that you love and or the things you have to do, the lingering thought will go away. If it comes back, and it will, even strongly, just start over, rinse repeat, this is teaching your brain how to break this thinking pattern and is very powerful.

Q.) how become fearless??

2008-11-26T19:06:00.000-08:00

A.) You have to be willing to face the consequences of failure. If you can come to grips with those in your head, you can then become fearless!

Question below!

2008-11-26T11:46:00.000-08:00

Q.) Hi Derek. I seem to OCD about the thought of \\\'suicide\\\'. It makes it even worse that a cousin of mine committed suicide as well. I currently see a therapist, and I take medication for my thoughts. But, I don\\\'t know anymore. I don\\\'t hate my life, I just get these thoughts. Is there any way I can get rid of them? :(

A.) Yes, first if you ever feel like you are going to hurt yourself or others to call 911 right away. Then, yes these thoughts can go away, first what you want to do is to find a passion. Write down right now the things that you love to do, this that you can do now that don't require you to go buy anything or whatever. Now make a goal to try to get really good at these things. Put together a plan on how you are going to pursue and complete your dream by a certain time and then go after it with all your might! Pray to God and He will help you figure out what your dream is and to get through anxiety and OCD etc. You can do it and I believe in you! Tell me what it is you have chosen and let me know how it's going!

Q.) How do I stop unwanted obsessive thoughts?

2008-11-26T11:44:00.000-08:00

A.) Allow the thoughts to remain. The thoughts that we resist, persist. So just focus on what it is that you do want to think about and allow the unwanted thought to continue in the background. You will notice that it is like a little kid screaming for attention but it doesn't deserve any attention because it just want to annoy you and to hurt you. So focus on Phil 4:8.

Question below!

2008-11-26T11:40:00.000-08:00

Q.) I have had OCD since I was 11 (I am now 20) and it has taken up nearly every day since then. I have obsessive thoughts more than physical compulsions: things like if I don\\\'t do something a certain way then someone will get hurt etc, which I\\\'m sure a few others will have had. It is always a split-second thought though, which doesn\\\'t give my brain enough time to rationalise it. My head is very full of these thoughts and rituals that go with it. Are there any ways to help alleviate these thoughts, and to effectively calm my mind down?

A.) Find a nice comfortable place and chair where there is peace and quiet. Then close your eyes and picture yourself in the middle of the desert. All the sand around you is your anxiety and OCD. It's the anxiety and your rituals. Now picture a wind come and blow all the sand away so that you are left on a solid wood floor. The anxiety and OCD are still there, but they are there in a way that you can use them for your benefit. They are there in the form of a beautiful hardwood floor! You can now travel more freely, are in more control. You have this control over anxiety and OCD. All you have to do is to picture it to happen in your head, once you can do that, then you can work to make it a reality!

Q.) Why do some people in a family have ocd and the others dont

2008-11-26T11:37:00.000-08:00

A.) Everyone's circumstances are different, such as my dad watched my sister, mother, brother and me all get anxiety, but he never did. It's just how we handle situations. A lot of time subconsciously anxiety and OCD can be contagious because we see it and subconsciously process to do the same behavior. Sometimes it can get very complicated, but what I would tell you is that once you get over it, you can help the others in your family that may have it and free your family from such an unneccessarhy struggle!

Q.) What is the reason of having OCD?

2008-11-26T11:35:00.000-08:00

A.) The reason that we have developed OCD is because our brains used it like a coping mechanism. It is usually triggered during something that is very stressful or something that reminds you of something very stressful. Even a mild event can be the straw that breaks the camel's back so to speak. We must learn how to replace this OCD habits, with more productive habits that will not only allow us to deal with stress better, but will actually improve the quality of our lives in every way shape and form!

Question below!

2008-11-26T11:32:00.000-08:00

A.) I have suffered from trichotillomania for the last 24 years. My son shows strong signs of OCd. His habits are picking speed day by day. He adds on a new compulsion every week. We desperately need to help him without SSRIs. I am researching Inositol and some other herbs. I need answers. Can you help?

Don't take any supplements without first talking to your earbalist and doctor who should work together if you are going the medicine route. The last thing you want to do is to make things worse by trying to self medicate! Once he is on a good medication that helps to calm the severity of the OCD, then he can start to tackle his OCD problem so that later on he can be weaned off the medication and of course never take him off medication unless directed by your physician.

Q.) Why am I so OCD that most people think I\\\'m retarded

2008-11-26T11:29:00.001-08:00

A.) They may think you are retarded because your habits are a little different than those who are observing you. Don't worry about what others think. Most people are nice, while some are cruel. Some think they need to find validation at other's expense. You don't worry about those people. See, you are blessed, because having OCD will require and force you to learn a skillset that will give you the tools you need to outsucceed those that ridicule you. You can do it!

Q.) How to stop obsessing about washing and keeping evrything clean?

2008-11-26T10:48:00.000-08:00

A.) Once you clean the things that need to be cleaned once, you say to yourself, "I have cleaned this item just like any normal person would and I will not clean it until I use it just like any normal person would. I am normal, therefore, I will choose to do normal behavior.

Question below!

2008-11-26T06:56:00.000-08:00

Q.) can i cure myself from ocd? most people say that ocd has no cure, what is your opinion?

A.) That's their reality. In my experience, it can be cured because I used to suffer from major OCD and now I don't. I myself was very skeptical of anything less than treatment because when you are suffering from it, it seems logical that you could never get over it, but now looking at it from the other side, it's actually silly to think you can't get over OCD, it's just a habit!

Q.) what is the reason people have OCD?

2008-11-25T10:48:00.000-08:00

A.) It's a coping mechanism used by the brain to calm yourself, and relieve stress. It's called a faulty association. Just like in a tramatic situation, if you are on an airplane and it was about to crash, you just grab a bad and think its a parachute, but it's just a backpack, you are dealing with the percieved emergency in the wrong way. Just like that a person with OCD doen'st grab the parachute, they grab the backpack and most times, it feels like OCD just creeps up on you because in that moment when you grabbed a bad, you were in the heat of the moment in your emotions and were not thinking clearly.

Q.) How can you cure Pure-O (awful scary thoughs)?

2008-11-25T10:46:00.000-08:00

A.) Bring them out of your head, because that is the only place where they are really scary. OCD thoughts take advantage of the fact that our brains don't know the difference between what is real or not in certain aspects, like when we are watching a scary movie, we will actually cry, or jump from being scared or laugh, etc.

Tell yourself outloud what's going on, tell a friend and write it down as well. The more media you can you to get it out of your head, then you will be able to take the piecies of it and apply the methods in these posts into finally getting rid of OCD for good!

Q.) will i ever be able to control my ocd?

2008-11-25T10:44:00.000-08:00

A.) As long as you ask yourself that question, the answer is no. What I would say is, I'm glad that I've finally started learning how to control my OCD. I am glad that I am taking all the necessary steps that I can take to get rid of OCD for good so I can move on with my life!

Question below!

2008-11-25T10:41:00.000-08:00

Q.) I have had ocd for about 20 years with all theclassic symtoms of checking and handwashing..for about the last year I\\\'ve experienced intrusive thoughts..ostly causing harm to myself or loved ones..we recently moved into a new house with gas fireplaces and stoves..I have continuous intrusive thougts that I will throw a match on the gas intake and blow the house up..it causes me so much anxiety and the horrific images in my head won\\\'t go away..I know I will never do this but the images and the \\\"what IF I did\\\" won\\\'t go away:( what can I do yo lessen the intrusive thought:(

A.) re word the "what if" statement to "what if I don't burn the house down?" What if I actually forget indulging these OCD thoughts.

remember these thoughts carefully!!!!!!!

care, but don't care too much!

always, in anything, look for the good components of the situation, always!

Phil 4:8, (do the work and look it up so you can appreciate it more)

Question below!

2008-11-25T10:37:00.000-08:00

Q.) I have ocd and i overanalyze my girlfriends voice. she is an amazing person and so wonderful. how do i deal with that, cause i feel like im drifting away....

A.) Stop overanalyzing her voice. What's the point. Half the time neither girls nor guys know what their saying anyway. Communication is very rough, 90 something percent of all communication is only partially understood. We honestly can't communicate with someone 100 percent. Then you got he voice and not just her words, well that's just another stadium to add to the magnanimous idea that we'll never really be able to know exactly what another person is saying. I do give you cudoes for trying!

Focus on how amazing she is and not on trying to like the cia with her voice, just trust her, just let go and trust her, your anxiety will go down, her's in turn will,

we bring about our fears in real life, therefore get rid of any fears you can think of.

Question below!

2008-11-25T10:33:00.000-08:00

Q.) I am a 45 year old mother of 3, happily married and I suffer from both Graves disease and have recently had a complete hysterectomy. I am constantly questioning my sexuality! This is out of the blue. I also dwell on past mistakes from 25-30 years ago. Is it depression of OCD or a combo?

A.) Let go and let past be past. I love that quote from a great movie.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made by God who loves you and it is His will that you have a sane mind. The Bible to tells exactly how to think at Phil 4:8. Take the inititive to look it up and find the answer to all of your troubles. The love of Jesus will set you free from these obsessions. Don't believe it, try me. I ain't playing, period.

Q.) How can be free of the hyper-focus and tunnel vision of ocd?

2008-11-25T10:32:00.001-08:00

A.) Stop trying to fight the thoughts of obsessive compulsive disorder, instead, embrace them because your brain want to think about them, but at the same time, focus on what you really would prefer to be thinking about. Of course the OCD thoughts aren't just going to run away like a little school girl, but they will fade out over time.

Q.) why do I feel like this

2008-11-25T10:29:00.000-08:00

A.) This is a very common problem that people feel, it's normal. We have that feeling everytime we feel something is out of the everyday norm. Just accept this as an obstacle that you can learn how to turn into a helper. I cover a lot about how to use situations that seem to be bad and actually twist them in your favor. That is part of the skillset that you will learn throughout all of what I teach.

Question below!

2008-11-25T10:18:00.000-08:00

Q.) Can an OCD sufferer be cured on his own without the help of medications & or behaviour therapy? How?

A.) yes, that is how I did it. However, this is the one that can be the hardest unless you get your hands on some really good psychological technologies. Otherwise, you could spend years trying to master these ways. The best case scenerio is to find someone who knows how to do what you want to do and to go to them and say, teach me oh wise one...That has worked for me in the sales field, and I became the number one in my company!

Q.) am i gay?

2008-11-25T10:14:00.000-08:00

A.) I don't know if that is the lifestyle that you have chosen. As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. God loves everyone, no matter what color, race, sex, preference, etc. The only problem is that there are some things that are wrong. If you really think about things in your heart you will start to develop an sense of what is really write and wrong and we have a Bible to guide us either way. What I would say to you is that OCD does not indicate that you are gay. OCD is just like a habit, that being gay is a habit, I remember when I was sooooooo attracted to cigarettes and to alcohol and I thought I was betrying myself by trying and retraining my brain not to like these things. Being gay is the same way, it's just a habit that can be broken. period.

Q.) how can i cure my ocd quickly on my own?

2008-11-25T10:12:00.001-08:00

A.) You do the seven day challenge. Part of the seven day challenge will have you pick the toughest ritual that you struggle not doing and challenging yourself to see how long you can go without performing that ritual. Then have a reward ready for yourself if you succeed and try again if you fail. This will help you exponentially!

Q.) How do I treat/ stop my OCD obessions?

2008-11-25T10:09:00.000-08:00

A.) This week, I want you to pick the OCD that is the hardest for you to resist and not to try not to do it at all, instead, I want to to try to see how long you can put off doing the ritual. Do that all this week and every time try to beat your last time! Let me know after the week what happened!

Q.) i scar about thouching things

2008-11-25T10:06:00.000-08:00

A.) When you feel the fear come over you as you go to touch the things that you know you have to touch, just simply say to yourself, I have to touch these things because that's what people without OCD touch, so that's normal. Since I want to be normal, I am make a conscious decision to touch the things I have to and know that our bodies are well equipped to deal with touching normal every day things. Say your fear out loud, admit it to your friends, make it look dumb to your brain. exaggerate it to the ridiculous.

Question below!

2008-11-25T10:02:00.000-08:00

Q.) My wife keep cleaning and mopping the floor until 2-3 o\\\'clock in the morning

A.) Get her to agree to hand you the mop after she has mopped it one time. The hold her and she struggles and cries through the withdrawals of not doing the mopping. Make sure you are loving and protective of here like you never have been before. She does not need a lecture, but words of encouragement. She wants you to tell her that you believe in her.

Q.) can children outgrow ocd

2008-11-25T09:59:00.000-08:00

A.) Yes they can, as it's just a habit. Any habit as far as I am concerned can be overcome. Furthurmore, I have truly learned that these skills we are learning by getting rid of our OCD for good can and has imporved my love life, my work life, my school life and my church life! I Praise God for this process and am excited about it, as if you can't tell!

Q.) what can help me repeating things that are harming me?

2008-11-23T08:39:00.000-08:00

A.) Don't repeat things that are harmful to you. The problem that many people with OCD don't realize is that they fill their bodies with harmful chemicals every time they dwell on negative thoughts. Negative thoughts cause negative feelings, positive thoughts cause, you guessed it, positive feelings.

Stop the cycle right in it's tracks when negative thoughts come knocking at the door of your mind. Say "STOP!" then allow the thought to persist, don't fight it, but ALSO as well, focus on what you love thinking about. It could be anything, even mythical creatures like dragons, unicorns and virgins.

Q.) is being indecisive ocd

2008-11-23T08:32:00.000-08:00

A.) It can a a sign of OCD or an early warning sign of OCD. If you want to nic that in the butt right now, go to a restaraunt today and order the best thing you can find in five seconds. Don't waver, don't doubt it, stand by your decision.

Go to the mall and if you're a guy, approach a girl and say, Hey, I want your opinion on something, do women prefer someone who is decisive in that they make quick decisions or someone who takes their time with decisions?"

If you are a lady, ask a random man this. If you afraid that he may think you are hitting on him, ask a guy that is working at one of the stores so he can't follow you.

The reason it has to be the opposite sex is because this will help you even further to face indecisiveness.

Q.) Can I get help outside of a psychologists office that does not cost money?

2008-11-22T08:57:00.000-08:00

A.) Of course you can! The internet if chock full of all the information you'll ever need to do almost anything you want. The power at your fingertips is nothing short of astounding. Simply pull up Google and begin with the most obvious keywords you can think of. OCD, Obsessive-compulsive-disorder, obsessive-compulsive behavior, treatment-of-ocd, ocd-meds etc. The dashes mean that google will look at the combination of words as one keyword. If you want to do a phrase match put quotes around the keyword "". If you want to do an exact match, put brackets, []. Let me know if you find anything useful or interesting.

You are welcome to use my free blog with hundreds of OCD questions answered, as well as the hundreds of articles on OCD and every other free resource on the site!

Yours for mental freedom,

Derek

Question below!

2008-11-21T21:28:00.000-08:00

Q.) I have been diagnosed with OCD but where I am from there is not much help so I live with it. What help is out there? It is ruining my new relationship and I need the negative thought process to stop!!

A.) There is the cure for OCD out there. There are ways to "treat" it out there as well. It all depends on what you believe is possible for you. For myself, at first I thought that I would only be able to "treat" OCD. Yet as I became more knowledgeable in the subject and met and talked to other people, I realized that there was indeed a cure for OCD, in fact, many cures. I have taken the best of what I've learned and included these techniques into my answers here, products, etc.

Q.) How to I reduce the number of intrusive thoughts?

2008-11-21T20:12:00.000-08:00

A.) One of the best way to reduce the number of intrusive thoughts is to focus on getting rid of your strongest kind of OCD. Focus on getting rid of the worst OCD that you struggle with and here's why. If you focus on your weakest one first, and tackle them from easiest to hardest, you are fighting an uphill battle. However, if you tackle the hardest one first and get a hold of that one, it's all down hill from there baby. This is by far the best approach. As far as decreasing the number of intrusive thoughts, Focusing on the hardest one will take up most of your mind.

How to get rid of it?

2008-11-21T19:59:00.000-08:00

This is the most popular question by far that I get. There are many different ways and techniques that can be used. It really depends on what kind you are talking about that we can really pinpoint the best course of action. However, generally speaking, the best way is to replace the habit of performing any rituals that you are doing with a more productive habit that brings happiness into your life, such as a passion.

Question below!

2008-11-21T10:13:00.000-08:00

Q.) looking into people,s eyes and talking .i feel uncomfortable and sometimes also unspekable , giving me a fear that the other person may feel bad.

A.) This is natural. The more that you do it, the more comfortable you will be with it! Have no fear, as most of the time, the other person is wondering what you think of them and trying to seek your approval!

Question below!

2008-11-21T10:12:00.000-08:00

Q.) ahhahah thanks for telling me that all our mouths have more germs than in the toilets. wooooow derek......honestly i\\\\\\\'m feeling so relieved about this germ thing and all that time iwas thinking the opposite about germs that it will harm us to death in the long run! anyway. my brother told me that our mouth have more germs than the sink and i didn\\\\\\\'t believe him until u mention it....ehee...... thank u derek.....at least i know i free from this germ thing about washing my hands over and over !! i now can think about what u saying and shorten the time i wash my hands!!! love u always derek....from moy ..that\\\\\\\'s my chinese name.... bye... at least i know i can move on with my life not thinking about this germ thing will kill me ...if i don\\\\\\\'t wash my hands plenty.... ,i hope this goes for my glasses and body.....does it?

A.) Of course it does!

Q.) Can it be cured permanently?

2008-11-21T10:10:00.001-08:00

A.) Yes, I am living proof of that. There may be times when you may be tempted to backslide, but as long as you use all the tools that you are learning here, it's virtually impossible for you to become an OCD sufferer again, you just know too much and are too equipped to deal with it. I like to compare it to smoking, I quit smoking, then I was still tempted by it, now I am appalled by it, the same thing with OCD.

Q.) how can you stop the phobias?

2008-11-21T10:07:00.000-08:00

A.) Facing them one by one is the best way to stop them. You have to not worry about them as much. Well, how do you do that? Notice the way that you react to them when they come up. When you think of them, what kind of thoughts come to your mind? Are you afraid, are you mad? Think about this and notice this. Then what you can do is to try to act a different way. Say next time you get a phobia thought, you can say, no, instead of being afraid, I am going to be happy because this is a fresh opportunity for me to be able to get over this phobia. Now you have a chance to show yourself what you are made of. Don't worry if the first times you try to face your fears, you get really scared. That is natural. But continue until you succeed and use all the other resources on this site to help you on your journey!

Question below!

2008-11-21T08:31:00.000-08:00

Q.) Hi, I am spending so much time trying to help someone with anxiety and ocd, I am so stressed out because the person I am trying to help, has no job, self medicates, and just simply won\\\'t listen to me. He gets so irritated when I try to talk to him, like he doesn\\\'t even care how much I have done for him and how much money he spends and doesn\\\'t even work. I just don\\\'t know what to do anymore, how do I help him or make him get help?

A.) Having been in that same situation I can tell you that you have to understand that he does not look at the world the way you do. You can't hold that against him. The world is a scary place to him and he doesn't even know why. You are blessed in that you don't suffer from irrational fears. That you don't get a shock of anxiety in your stomach for no reason. It's very tough for someone to work when they can't even walk down the street without feeling like they are going to die. The best thing you can do is to stop thinking about how you feel and put yourself in their shoes and try to feel what they feel. Only then will you be able to help them. He won't listen to you because you truly haven't put yourself in his shoes. If you did, you would truly understand how hard it must be for him. Having OCD is like being in a wheelchair in your mind. Until you are able to get a hold of it, it basically renders you useless. A person who has OCD already feels useless, then if they have a significant other who just compounds it, it just makes them want to kill themselves.

You need to have patience. If you want to really change others, you gotta change yourself. Stop looking at him as someone you have to change, but look at yourself and figure out how you can change. People respond in kind. If you act frustrated toward him, he will close off and do the same. If you have a shockingly good attitude when he least expects it, he will also act in kind and respond with a shockingly good attitude after a while.

Talk to him and find out if he wants to get better, if he wants to work. If he says he does, do what you can to help him. He will get better much faster if you think about how he feels and he knows that there is at least one person that believes in him.

At the same time, you need to tell him what you are and are not willing to do. Don't help him perform rituals, don't let him talk you into performing any type of ritual. Be there for him, but don't enable him. If he doesn't make any money, don't just keep giving him money. You don't have to let him drain your account. Instead, just be there for him emotionally and tell him that you love him if this is your significant other. That way he knows you are there for him, but that you won't take his crap either!

Question below!

2008-11-21T08:20:00.000-08:00

Q.) How to realise that you are not going to do something wrong? Why question yourself when you know you will not?

A.) In the Bible Paul talks about doing that which he does not want to do. This is out of old habits that have already been established. Everyone knows it's not the easiest thing to break habits. You may have developed a habit of questioning yourself. You simply need to break the cycle. The next time you go to question yourself, say "NO!" "I don't care!" This honestly, is a really powerful phrase, "I don't care what happens!" Try it, it's liberating!

Question below!

2008-11-21T08:16:00.000-08:00

Q.) hi derek it\\\'s moy moy, thanks for a little boof on the the part in writing so long and repeatedly, let me try to not repeat myself since u believe i can do then moy can do it! ok well, i have this fear of my small sized mp3player and its headset with it will not work again if i switch on the mp3 player while the volume was already to the full maximun. i meant leaving the volume to the highest and then switching it off and when i ready to use it i put it on and obviously the volume will be high already, i am afraid that it will destroy the speakers in the headset and mp3player itself will be destroyed too.. and that means i have to buy another expensive one. cost plenty money that\\\'s why. i fear this and i kept on switching it on and taking it off over and over and over and that is frustrating me.. stress i should call it.... what to do derek.... love u always ....from moy moy theresa....bye bye

A.) In this case, you just gotta trust that the manufacturer of the mp3 player knew what they were doing and that unless it says otherwise in the instructions, that it's ok to leave the volume wherever it is at. Next time you go to change the volume repeatedly, just say "STOP!" Put the player down and walk away. Tell yourself that you have already changed it and that you refuse to do it again. You have to take control and responsibility of your actions. You are not a slave to your OCD unless you want to be. Sometimes we've gotta be firm with ourselves.

Question below!

2008-11-20T15:14:00.000-08:00

Q.) hi derek, it\\\'s me again , i want to know if this is ocd and if this is ocd, tell me what to do....well, i was trying to dust off hair on my couch on one the sides where u placed your hands to rest on.. in my bedroom... i cover a blanket over my couch, i lift part of the blanket where i want to dust off the hair and then after a placed the blanket over the side of the couch to put it back how it was ,,, i felt as if something was tickling me by my hands making me think piece of my long black hair could have rolled on along my hands and fell back on that same spot where i was trying to dust off... i did this over and over and then i finally tell my self spite ocd no matter what i felt. i immediately told myself moy just spite the ocd now ...and immediately i dropped the blanket and cover it how it was before and walked away from the couch but remember derek i had my eyes closed while i was dusting off..... and i can\\\'t remember if i glance at the side of the couch where i was dusting with my hands or i open for a 1 or 2 or 3 or4 or 5 secs and i so happened to see a white spot or it could be a white thing there.... but what i trying to say derek is that when i walked away from the couch with my eyes closed i open my door to go outside and i kept on saying spite the ocd ... then i remembered i opened my eyes and looked down on the ground to put on my brown slippers but at the same time i saw a white spots on the ground.... and then for a few seconds i was thinking and imagining i seeing a small white stuff shape like a circle was on the side of the couch where i was dusting.....at the same time i do not know if i really imagining or thinking ..or it could really be there and i could have seen the a white thing when i could have possible open my eyes while iwas back in my room dusting on the side of the couch... the point what i trying to find out derek is that is this an ocd.. and if it is please tell me how to think and what to think and what to do with these thoughts...... sometimes i clean a certain thing trying to dust off whatever i\\\'m trying to get rid of and then when i move from that area and started to walk with my eyes close so i trying not to see anything and when i open my eyes at the same time i was still holding on that strong negative feeling just after dusting whatever object it was i was doing and when i open my eyes and whatever i placed my eyes on i take those thoughts and imagine those thoughts were on that thing i was dusting off a while ago and theni end up thinking and believing it\\\'s in the object that iwas dusting off and then i end up giving in and went back dusting off over and over andd over.... .for example... the one i told u just after dusting the side of the couch trying to get rid of a hair...well i don\\\'t know if the hair their....but istill feeling it was there.. and then when i left the couch and walked straight to the door with my eyes closed and i opened it to see i put on my slippers and my eyes went straight to the ground but on the ground the truth is that the ground is painted with all kind of black and white spots and all kinds of colours..and it so happened my eyes lay upon one of the white spots and then i started to think and imagine it was on the couch.....now i don\\\'t know if i did see a white thing.. on the side of the couch while i was dusting off..i could have open my eyes for a few seconds with out i knowing....or a glance.....i can\\\'t remember ... derek sometimes it\\\'s so hard to let go...........of those thoughts... i just wondering if i holding on to those thoughts in my heart and while trying to let go it was too late because i saw things and i took those thoughts and imagine it as if it was there.......what to do derek......i think repeat myself while i\\\'m writing..i\\\'m trying to explain....sigh........just help derek. from moy........ and then i went downstairs.....while i thinking whether the white stuff there on the couch i started to think and imagine a piece of black haIR next to the white stuff........then i ask myself how can it haVE 2 WHITE STUFF...ONE ON THE GROUND AND THEN ONE ON THE SIDE OF THE COUCH.........AND I KNEW THAT THIS HAIR ALWAYS STICKING IN MY MIND.........DON\\\'T KNOW IF TI\\\'S THE CAUSE OF IT.....HELP AND ANSWER PLEASE DEREK.....LOVE U ALWAYS ...FROM MOY

A.) What you should do immediately is try to limit your paragraphs to a few sentences as you are right in saying that you repeat things and this will waste your precious time. You are doing a great job in stopping your rituals dead in their tracks. I really feel that you can do it Moy! Continue to do what you're doing, but make sure when you write to try to limit it simply because this is a point of obsession for you and you won't get better till you limit what you say. This will make you think about what you are writing and make you more efficient. I believe in you and you can do it!

Q.) Is OCD a biological problem as well as a psychological one?

2008-11-20T15:11:00.001-08:00

Technically speaking, yes, our psychological state depends on the connections, chemicals and electrical firings in our brain. However, there is no conclusive evidence to indicate that there is any difference in the brain of someone with OCD and someone without. However it has been shown that people with OCD use different parts of their brain more frequently. These are worry, fear, etc.

You can become completely OCD free by simply changing the way you think.

Q.) how it started after a surgery.

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A.) OCD is used by the brain sometimes as a coping mechanism. Coping mechanisms are needed by the brain to deal with stressful situations. That is why sometimes the body goes into shock. It's just your brain's way of dealing with a highly stressful situation. The best thing that you can do to help yourself with OCD is to reduce the stress that is in your life so that you are more able to deal with facing OCD and changing it. There are many different kinds of coping mechanisms. Some people smoke when they are stressed, some drink. I did both! A coping mechanism is something your brain does that it believes calms you and that it believes will reduce stress. That is why so many people think that cigarettes calm them when it's really a stimulant. Why do so many smokers need to take a lot of cigarette breaks, because their body relies on this to calm itself down instead of more healthy, less expensive habits. So...

Our coping mechanisms become habits. We can choose what habits we develop and which ones we starve.

Q.) how do you stop relapse

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A.) The same way you stopped OCD in the first place. Relapse usually tries to happen when the person is going through an event or a "percieved" event of significant important to the person.

This is the time when you need to focus on what you did in the first place and continue using those techniques.

As an ex-smoker, I used to crave cigarettes and I even relapsed a couple times. Every time I did what I did the first time to quit and never gave up. Now it makes me sick to even think about smoking and I'm not kidding. It really makes me sick.

One way to help is to go to youtube and watch videos of people with OCD. You will see these people and feel sorry for them, then you will think, "Am I like that?" "I don't want to be like that!" This will help deter your brain from using OCD as a coping mechanism.

Question below!

2008-11-20T10:41:00.000-08:00

Q.) My friend says he is fighting same-sex attraction thoughts. He belives homosexuality is sinful, and is fighting these thoughts. His behavior is becoming very bizzarre, to the pioint of not being able to use is hands or even walk properly. His father wants him put in a facility for 24 hour watching, but his therapist says that will increase his stress and make him worse. Is he better off at home if his family tries to reduce his stress instead of trying to make him \\\"act normal\\\"

A.) Nothing should be forced. Our brains are wired to operate on "free will." A classic example is pastor's sons and daughters are notorious for being some of the most troublesome kids, the reason is because the brain wants what is deprived of it. The only way for your son to know for sure himself if he is gay or not is to allow the thoughts to come into his mind. As long as he fights these thoughts, they will get worse and will haunt him. He needs to get rid of friction by allowing himself to have these thoughts without dwelling on them.

I firmly believe that people should only be facilities if there is no one to take care of them, or they are a danger to themselves or to others.

Question below!

2008-11-20T10:34:00.000-08:00

Q.) i do not know the technique to make my question feel u most genuine so leave it.

A.) You don't need any specific technique as you do confidence and belief in whatever technique you are using. The "technique" could be spinning on your head break dancing or simply playing chess, if you believe it is working, it will because OCD is a mind condition. (It's made up)

Q.) HOW TO STOP THOUGHTS

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A.) You don't try. The harder you try to block out a thought, the more it will persist. Instead, you focus on something else and get immersed in it and the bothersome thought will fade away on it's own.

Here's an example: You are trying not to think about avoiding cracks in the road when you walk. You start to think about what you have to do today and then you start to think about your job and then about school and then that project that's due, then you start to think about how it's going to get done and when it should be done and somewhere along the line you forgot about the cracks in the road and then you realize that you forgot about the cracks in the road so you get a shot of anxiety again and start to avoid the cracks in the road again.

This week keep practicing changing your thought patterns like I just outlined. It's good mental practice and is very powerful with some practice.

Question below!

2008-11-19T15:50:00.000-08:00

Q.) Can OCD be cured by a behavior therapy program alone or is it bio chemical in nature too because I know that the major symtom I have now started with a thought that threw my whole world out of wake it came at a time when I was in a nervious breakdown and my mind and body were screwed up. And I notice it gets worst during times of stress and one time when i was taking a homopathic supplement the symtoms went bullestic chemically all on their own I wan\\\'t thinking or doing nothing to bring that kind of response on. So if it\\\'s also bio-chemical can it only be cured by supplements or some how healing the brain?

A.) Your physiology changes with new behaviors alone. Your brain actually rewires itself when you change your habits. Read the exercises from my previous answers for today and I think that's the best course of action for your case. Let me know how it turned out this week on this blog as a reply. Don't forget to do that.

Question below!

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Q.) My partner suffers from a form of OCD (BDD) and is very angry and frustrated. this manifests itself in different ways. He breaks things in the house and is verbally agressive towards me. This behaviour was infrequent at first but has now become part of his routine and happens instantaneously. what can we or should we do. He is seeing a cognitive therapist and taking medication.

A.) If he is abusing you, you need to get out of the house or he needs to go somewhere else until you and your counselor agree that you are safe. Noone should have to be abused because of OCD. He needs to continue his medication and if it's not working, I would consider asking your therapist for an increse in the dose. Make sure that the medication is not making him worse.

Q.) How do I become free from OCD?

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A.) You become free from OCD the minute that you stop performing rituals. You will have cravings but as long as you are not performing rituals, you are free from it and the cravings will die out. The same with quitting smoking, they are both just habits. Do the exercises that you see outlined in my previous answers as they are powerful and free to you!

Question below!

2008-11-19T15:44:00.001-08:00

Q.) My particular OCD deals with rituals that I have to do, and I feel that I have to do these rituals or people I love will die. What happens then? How can/do I get rid of OCD if I can\\\'t stop feeling so strongly that if I stop doing the rituals, people I love will die?

A.) Today, don't do one of those rituals and see if the person dies. Seriously. They won't. This will start to show the the fast way that your belief is faulty. Then replace this belief with the belief that if you don't perform the ritual, That you won't die living with OCD.

Q.) obsessive concern about damage to paintwork and body of my car

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A.) Don't worry about your paintwork. Just know that these things, we can't take with us when we die. You painted a vehicle which can get into an accident and is exposed to the elements outside. What I would do ask the company who painted it the best way to take care of it, and follow their instructions to the letter, do NOTHING MORE or nothing less.

Q.) how to stop assumptions of contamination

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A.) If you assume something is contaminated, you're right. Germs are everywhere, they are on our hands and in our mouths. In fact, there are more germs in our mouths than there are on our toilets. I am not trying to gross you out but to reveal to you that germs are not as bad as you think they are. We actually have live microscopic bugs in our intestines that help us digest food. They are necessary, They are not really bugs, but bacteria. Acidophilus for one. You can even by it as a supplement. Yougurt also has active cultures. We cannot worry about stuff we can't control. However, without germs, we would die. They need us and we need them. It's a good thing because our bodies defenses against any bad kinds are way more powerful than you could ever imagine.

Q.) How do I help someone to get help for ocd?

2008-11-19T15:34:00.000-08:00

A.) All you need is exactly how you found me. What I would do is not spend so much time looking for help, but actually more time facing the fears that are driving their rituals head on. Help them pick their toughest ritual and this week see how long they can go without performing the ritual before they give in. Help them set a record and coach them. This will start to show them that it's possible to decide not to do the ritual for a while and it will start to show them that they do indeed have control over it. These baby steps work better.

Q.) What is the anxiety that has caused this?

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A.) Depends on what's going on. Anxiety is caused by fear. Ask yourself what fear is driving you to do rituals. Then this week I want you to plan one day with a friend where you will go and face your fear head on. Let me know what happened. I think you will be pleasantly surprised.

Q.) How can I control my anger

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A.) Ask yourself if you should be angry about what you are angry about. Most of the time we should not react with such anger. Tell yourself something funny at your most angry point, such as, "Thank God my feet don't stink today!" Say this outloud and see what happens to your anger...